To my dearest wife and friend, through storms of life; trials, uncertainties, and seasons of waiting and sorrow, we have learned together to weather the inevitable. We have committed our spirits to one another. We've committed our marriage, and our future into God’s faithful hands, finding Him to be our unshakeable refuge. Intertwined with this vertical trust in God is the horizontal trust that has defined our life together.
Proverbs 31 asks, "An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life."
Forty years ago, God answered that rhetorical question for me in you. You are that rare treasure, far more precious than jewels, a ruby refined through time. Your worth has only grown brighter with the years. My heart has trusted in you fully, without reservation or regret. You have done me good, and not harm, all these days...through joys and hardships, in abundance and need, in strength and vulnerability. You have always been my faithful companion; wise in the ways of grace, compassionate with all people, and strong enough to withstand my complexity. Building our home, nurturing our family, and pointing us always to Christ by your example. Because of you, I have lacked no good thing; our life has been rich in love, laughter, grace, and purpose.
These are the wonderful qualities one would expect to read in a hallmark card or devotional book. Sounds amazing, impressive, and maybe even a little impossible. But I can say these things in all honesty because they are true in their own way. In their own beautifully imperfect, grace-covered way. You are real, human, and extraordinary all at once, and that makes your excellence even more precious.
Forty years and several months ago, I was lost. Alone. Struggling to find my way in a world of my own making. I wasn’t following Christ. I was living day by day out of an impoverished mind and heart, down on my luck, no prospects, working only to survive another day. No savings. No future. I’d already destroyed the lives of my children by falling into sin more than I care to admit. I had no plan for escape or redemption. To be honest, I never believed there was anything on my horizon.
In my grief and times of anxiety, I would cry out to a God I had little hope in seeing. I would pray for a rescuer, only to wake up the next day and begin again, chasing my next high in the grip of addiction and worthlessness. And then, suddenly and unexpectedly, God threw me a lifeline.
I met you while scraping by as a truck driver/foreman for $4.35 an hour, barely managing my own life. You were working similar wages as a nurse’s aide, going to school nights for your licensing, raising your broken family as best you could; all while holding fast to grace, love, and right-living. I’d never known someone like you. You seemed like something from a bygone era: pure, steadfast, untouched by the darkness I’d drowned in. You’d never even tried drugs...not even once.
When I first got to know you, I remember thinking, "This is a good woman. I haven’t got a snowballs chance in hell of making my way into her heart." But somehow, in God’s strange and merciful way, we were brought together. We discovered something real in each other...not mutual destruction as the years may have seem at times, but redemption.
I have always believed, and still do, that God sent you to me as the direct answer to those desperate prayers. From our very first date, I knew I had to change. I couldn’t remain the man I was and hope to be your partner in life. I had nothing material to offer you; no wealth, no prospects, no property. I didn’t even own a home or a car. All I had was a strong back and a willingness to work hard at whatever came my way, just to make do. Yet you saw something worth believing in.
Together, we raised our small family as best we could; imperfectly, as some might judge, but with our whole hearts. We concentrated only on caring for them, sacrificing everything we had. What little we possessed, we poured out completely for that sacred endeavor. Our time, our energy, our dreams deferred...all laid down in love.
Through the storms of life...trials, uncertainties, seasons of waiting, and sorrow, we have learned together to weather the inevitable as one. We have committed and recommitted our spirits to one another, our marriage, and our future into God’s faithful hands, finding Him to be our unshakeable refuge. I wish we began with God as our spiritual leader in our marriage and home, but I know He was there if only behind the scenes.
Today, intertwined with this vertical trust in God is the horizontal trust that has defined our life together. Forty years ago today, God answered that Proverbs 31 question for me in you. You are that rare treasure, far more precious than jewels, a ruby refined through time and trial, your worth only growing brighter with the years.
On this, our 40th wedding anniversary...December 20, 2025.. I thank God every day for rescuing me through you, my ruby treasure, my partner in refuge, my answered prayer.
Happy Ruby Anniversary, my love. May we continue walking this path together, taking refuge in Him, for all the days He gives us.
Together we've done what was expected of us in Christ. Together we’ve built a home, nurtured our family to the best of our abilities with the resources we were given, and pointed each other, and them, to Christ through our steadfast example. Maybe not always quietly or with great patience, but always with a joined heart that has learned to loved God by living with Him in the context of the days of our marriage, come what may.
With all my heart, forever redeemed because of you, my heart has always trusted in you fully, without reservation or regret. And I look forward to whatever the Lord has in store for us in our tomorrows.
Your husband
Michael