Living with Godly Sincerity and Open-Hearted Reconciliation
2 Corinthians 1:12-14
"For our boast is this, the testimony of our conscience, that we behaved in the world with simplicity [holiness] and godly sincerity, not by earthly wisdom but by the grace of God, and supremely so toward you. For we are not writing to you anything other than what you read and understand and I hope you will fully understand—just as you did partially understand us—that on the day of our Lord Jesus you will boast of us as we will boast of you."
What is Paul really saying here?
He's basically saying he's relying on God’s grace rather than manipulative "earthly wisdom." And he's pointing this out by emphasizing a singleness of heart, a lack of duplicity or hidden motives.
Apparently some among the Corinthians (probably the "superapostles" and false teachers) had accused him of being inconsistent or deceitful. That he was guilty of doublespeak, and not being the same person in public as in private. And having changed his travel plans these people were casting doubt upon his character, saying he was operating from cunning, self-interest, and hidden agendas.
Factions, gossip, and "trash talk" have plagued church communities from the very beginning, and they persist even today. Jealousy, quarreling, slander, discord and selfish ambition; the Corinthian church Paul wrote to was riddled with these divisions. And so, it’s no coincidence that in defending his own integrity in verses 12-14, Paul emphasizes simplicity and godly sincerity; a life without hidden agendas or duplicity, as the antidote to the very accusations that were flying around.
I can see it now. Paul no sooner leaves Corinth to visit the church in Asia when the "parking lot" meetings (or hallway huddles, text threads, or whispered side conversations) begin. Probably gathered around reading Paul's letter in an informal huddle, probably after official meetings. In these conversations where grievances are aired, and decisions are second-guessed, certain power players would voice their complaints without accountability.
Why do these things happen? What is it about people that they have to get involved in these sorts of bad behavior?
In my experience it often stems from unresolved tensions, fear of open confrontation, or a lack of trust in the process. And even more insidiously stemming from a worldview tainted by one's own duplicitous nature.
The Bible doesn’t mince words on this:
Proverbs 16:28
"A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends."
Ephesians 4:29-31
"We’re called to speak only what builds others up, putting away bitterness, rage, and slander."
So, Paul steps away, and it's as if the vacuum invites grievances to surface without direct accountability. In Corinth, false apostles and influentials exploited that space to undermine Paul, questioning his motives and consistency. It’s a pattern as old as the church itself. At its root, it’s a mix of human nature and fallen tendencies that haven’t changed much in 2,000 years. Borne out of pride and selfish ambition. People crave influence or validation, so airing complaints elevates their voice or aligns others with their viewpoint. When someone feels overlooked, threatened, or hurt, indirect venting feels safer than direct reconciliation. And it's especially hard on a church community when the leadership is engaged in these things.
The congregation takes its cues from those in authority. If elders, pastors, or influential members whisper critiques in parking lots, text threads, or private lunches instead of addressing issues openly and biblically, it normalizes the very duplicity Paul was defending himself against. It's the same in any group, whether it's a church or government, school or family. When leaders model pride, comparison, and indirect attacks, it gives permission for the whole body to fracture.
Again scripture is blunt about this:
James 3:1 warns that teachers will be judged more strictly, precisely because their influence is greater. 1 Timothy 5:19–20 instructs the church that accusations against elders be handled carefully but publicly if proven, so fear keeps others from the same sin.
When leadership engages in (or quietly permits) gossip, triangulation, or passive-aggressive undermining, it erodes trust faster than almost anything else. And worse than that it teaches the flock that indirectness is acceptable Christian behavior.
All of this grieves the Holy Spirit, who is the Spirit of unity and truth.
Paul’s response is very interesting; he doesn’t retaliate with equal measure. Instead, he boasts in his weakness. He simply defends himself with transparency and sincerity, and keeps pointing the church back to Christ rather than himself. And Christ has pointed his disciples toward reconciliation.
This discipline comes from Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 18:15–17
First go privately (one-on-one), speak directly, humbly, and lovingly. The aim is quick resolution without involving others. If they listen and repent, it’s over.
This first step is critical, if one party refuses to communicate the matter is finished. No respect and no resolve can prevail.
If they don’t listen, bring 1–2 mature believers. This establishes facts objectively, and protects against misunderstanding. Again, if they respond, restoration happens, no further steps are needed. If there is still no restoration, the matter must be settled in another way.
If they still refuse, bring the matter to the whole congregation (the local body). This involves communal confrontation and a plea for repentance. If there’s no repentance even then, remove them from fellowship.
This isn’t shunning out of hatred. Jesus treated Gentiles and tax collectors with outreach and love, calling them to repentance. It protects the community while leaving the door open for future restoration.
You can’t force someone to reconcile. If one party refuses to engage at the beginning private stage; won’t meet, won’t listen, shuts down the conversation, then in a very real sense, the Matthew 18 process cannot proceed in its intended form.
You’ve fulfilled your responsibility: you’ve gone in sincerity, seeking restoration. There’s no basis for further steps because the later stages require verifiable refusal after clear, witnessed attempts. And so there cannot be reconciliation; without mutual respect and willingness to communicate, true resolve isn’t possible. This is where wisdom and pastoral discernment come in. Refusal to communicate itself can become the issue.
If someone consistently refuses private dialogue, it may reveal a deeper heart issue (pride, fear, unrepentance) that needs addressing differently. Sometimes the "sin" shifts; the original offense gives way to a refusal to reconcile, which itself harms the body.
Just the same, keep them in prayer and keep the door open for reconciliation, (see 2 Thessalonians 3:14–15 "do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother" ). This process isn’t about winning arguments or punishing people, it’s about pursuing peace, protecting unity, and reflecting the Father’s heart who runs to the prodigal son who has turned from his sin.
In real church life, the hardest part is often step one; because it requires humility, courage, and love. But when it’s practiced consistently and graciously, it can transform a gossip-prone, faction-filled church into one marked by the very simplicity and sincerity Paul defended.
Think about this, when God deals with you, it's often with tears and anguish; but also with great joy when reconciliation comes. That’s exactly the heart of the Father reflected in the Matthew 18 process, and in Paul's case.
When God deals with us over sin, it’s never cold or clinical. There’s anguish; the holy grief of a Father who hates what separates us from Him. Think again about the prodigal son. The father’s tears aren’t highlighted, but his anguish is implied in the long watching, the running toward his son, and the embracing. And then the explosive celebration when his son comes home.
Even in the rare cases where the process ends in removal from fellowship, it’s done with tears. God doesn’t delight in discipline; He delights in restored relationship. The tears and anguish are real. Though we don't read that the father was in anguish, believe me, he wasn't forever watching for his son's return because it wasn't tearing him apart every minute of every day. The father in the parable wasn’t scanning the horizon day after day out of casual curiosity or mild concern. That kind of persistent, longing watchfulness only comes from a heart that’s been torn open by love and loss.
That isn’t detached discipline or cool-headed justice. That’s a father whose heart has been aching for his child, carrying the daily weight of separation. This is God’s heart toward us; and the heart He wants reflected in His church. That’s the kind of community marked by the simplicity and godly sincerity Paul wrote about.
Heavenly Father,
Teach us the beauty of simplicity and godly sincerity that marked Your servant Paul. Guard our hearts from pride, duplicity, and the whispers that divide Your people. Give us courage to speak truth in love, to go first in private humility, and to pursue reconciliation with tears and hope, just as You pursue us. When discipline is needed, let it flow from anguish, not anger; and when restoration comes, fill us with the joy of the waiting father who runs to embrace his child. Unite Your church in transparency and grace, that the world may see Your love in us.
In the Holy name of Jesus, our Reconciler,
Amen.